Well, He’s More Expressive Than Hayden Christensen | A computer-animated Anakin Skywalker gets taunted into action in Star Wars: The Clone Wars.
STAR WARS: THE CLONE WARS
Directed by Dave Filoni. Featuring the voices of Matt Lanter, Ashley Eckstein, and James Arnold Taylor. Opens Fri, Aug 15.
**
If the rabid fans of the original Star Wars trilogy thought Jar Jar Binks was an atrocity, they’re going to have a field day with a cross-dressing Hutt with a Louisiana accent.
That’s the type of insanity you can expect from George Lucas’ newest expansion of the Star Wars franchise, the animated feature Star Wars: The Clone Wars—not to be confused with the animated television miniseries of the same name, or the forthcoming animated series that will be its progeny.
The film is, in fact, an extension of the miniseries’ story. Sometime during the war with the Trade Federation, Jabba the Hutt’s son gets kidnapped, and Jabba petitions the Jedi to find his gelatinous offspring and bring him back home. The Jedi only agree to help the mercurial slug because the Republic wants to use Hutt-controlled space to move their troops against the Trade Federation’s army. Eventual Sith Lord Anakin Skywalker is charged with saving the child, but he’s also forced to deal with training a new and reckless Padawan named Ahsoka.
Clone Wars is obviously aimed at a younger audience, and it only suffers for it. Besides leaving the question of how Jabba the Hutt even fornicates unanswered, the story plays out like the worst buddy-cop flick you’ve ever seen, with guns replaced by lightsabres. Ahsoka constantly refers to Anakin as “Skyguy” while he nicknames her “Snips”—since she’s so snippy, you see. It’s not until you meet Jabba’s transvestite uncle that the film generates any real emotion, and it’s definitely not the pleasant kind. Newcomers to the Clone Wars saga will also be confused by references to characters and events from the animated series.
The film is Lucasfilm’s first venture into CGI animation, and it’s surprisingly subpar—especially with George Lucas producing. I’m not demanding that every computer-animated film be Wall • E, but come on! Even Toy Story had smoother animation than Clone Wars does. The characters are as wooden and lifeless as the voice talent behind them—honestly, Anakin and Ahsoka appear to have been carved out of tree trunks—and they flop about the screen like marionettes. Anyone going into this film with the hopes of witnessing another awesome lightsabre duel will be disappointed when they see fight scenes that are less fluid than something shot in stop-motion.
I’m not sure why Clone Wars was even made into a feature-length film, aside from the obvious monetary reasons. It felt like no care was taken to make these characters and events feel real or important to the Star Wars canon—no lessons are learned, no issues are resolved, and even diehard fans of the franchise are going to have a hard time stomaching the adventures of Skyguy and Snips.
