Something like a third of the world celebrated a birth on Tuesday, a high holy day not only for Christianity, but for the much older worldwide cult of procreation. (Yes, I know Eastern Orthodox Christmas isn’t until next month, so put the keyboard down.)
Even more awkward than a misplaced “Merry Christmas” or “Happy Holidays” is figuring out what to say to the cult’s initiates when they produce offspring.
My idea of a baby shower gift is a box of condoms and a stern lecture. But I usually just offer my congratulations and change the subject before I say what’s really on my mind, like “Have you paid to offset its carbon footprint yet?” Or the equally welcome “I guess this means I’ll never get another holiday off, because I’ll have to cover for you.”
Although modern medicine and nutrition have allowed humanity to increase at a healthy geometric pace, a lot of us carry on like we’re the last remnants of a primeval mammal population threatened by dinosaurs. Our genetic programming is reinforced by social pressure to reproduce. Those who resist are stigmatized.
There are a lot of bad reasons to have children, even leaving aside carelessness: ego, vanity, boredom, displays of virility and fertility, parental nagging, perpetuation of the family name, and my personal favourite, a last gasp at saving a doomed relationship. And let’s face it: reproduction is often a substitute for accomplishment. If you don’t realize your dreams, you can make a project of terrorizing your little one into fulfilling them for you. If you want to make up for the past or try to control the future, and you can’t face working on yourself, having a kid may seem like a sensible alternative.
As much as procreation cultists like to stick the “selfish” label on those not having kids, it’s very much the other way around. People will ask for concessions and changes in the name of their children that they would never dare ask for themselves. One’s own children become an excuse for insularity and for abandoning the interests of the larger community. There is no one more ferociously narrow-minded and selfish than a parent who demands everything from the right to a large single-family home on a big lot to the displacement of “undesirables,” like other people’s troubled children living in group homes.
Birth rates are declining throughout much of the “developed” world, but governments are using economic incentives to try to reverse the trend, with jurisdictions like Quebec beginning to show some results. A diminishing population is a nightmare for governments and economists alike, as dependent as we are on increasing numbers of people to prop up the pyramid scheme of our economy. Growth of the type we value relies on an ever-expanding number of people.
What gets missed in the race to replace and increase the population is any kind of general discussion on what we want the world to look like, not just for our children, but for everyone else. We can see the results of this absentmindedness on a local level, where meaningful civic planning has ceased to exist. Anything visionary is sacrificed to the general appetite for more of the same (roads and other services for increasingly distant suburban neighbourhoods) and unrealistic expectations about property taxes.
The cult of reproduction is even more of an environmental, social, and political menace on a global level, but within the UN and its associated bodies, a conservative alliance of Catholics, Muslims, and the Bush administration blocks sane birth control and safe sex programs from reaching those who need them most. It’s no secret that untrammeled reproduction exacerbates conflicts in the developing world, or that the advance of human rights is correlated strongly with declining birth rates. Women in particular suffer where the cult is strongest, and thrive most as equals where reproduction isn’t seen as women’s highest possible achievement.
Every child should be a wanted child and should be treated as part of the community, not as a separate being above or below it. The cult of reproduction will always be with us and needs no special encouragement or proselytizing. We’d be a lot better off if more of us focused on the needs and well-being of children—and other people—who are already here.
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