GEMINI (MAY 21 – JUNE 20)
The dreams of destiny you’ll be having over the weekend will definitely make you determined to do what you gotta do to make them come true. The downfall of that, however, is you’ll just end up getting in your own way. No matter how bad you wanna work it after the weekend, you’ve gotta let destiny make its play.

CANCER (JUNE 21 – JULY 22)
You’re getting so good at juggling things that it seems like they’re magically floating in air on their own accord. Maybe it’s mental trickery or a matter of the-hand-is-quicker-than-the-eye, but whatever you’re doing, to us it just looks like your stuff flies. Now where juggling itself is kinda boring, this people will pay for!

LEO (JULY 23 – AUG. 22)
It don’t matter how tough you are nor how smart, this week you’re gonna be one big fuzzy heart. Yes, you will no longer be the fearsome feline but instead the little bitty kitty who just needs a scratch behind the ears and a rub on the belly. Remember: the more you purr, the more you get!

VIRGO (AUG. 23 – SEPT. 22)
It’s not that you don’t know that being a sensitive, caring, understanding and loving person can increase the good fortune that you receive in life. It’s just that you’re a Virgo — you know damn well exactly what you want and you ain’t gonna settle for anything less. That doesn’t leave much room for luck now, does it?

LIBRA (SEPT. 23 – OCT. 22)
Your scale has been pretty still for the last little while but something’s gonna send it swinging wildly before the weekend. Expend that extra kinetic energy that’s making you all wobbly by plunging yourself into some of your work. That way you’ll be able to reap the rewards in record time.

SCORPIO (OCT. 23 – NOV. 21)
The Moon’s in your sign next weekend and, like werewolves when It’s full, you’ll feel a transformation take hold of you as you’re consumed by a ravenous appetite for life. You exist for no other reason than to break the chains of repression, and woe unto those in your way. Sure, it’ll cause you troubles but nothing save a silver bullet could stop you now!

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22 – DEC. 21)
A baby bird’s main means o’ motivation is their feet. Their wings work, but only in a rudimentary way. They wave them when they want attention and keep them close to stay warm. But once they’re kicked out of the nest, they find their wings work wondrously, taking them places they’ve never been before. This week let your intellect be your feet and your heart your wings!

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22 – JAN. 19)
Love is like milk and people are like puffed rice cereal of no particular brand. You pour on some milk and right away it’s all snaps, crackles and pops. The crunchy rice and smooth moo-juice combo is a time-honoured treat. But, speaking of time, the longer you let it just sit there and don’t eat, the soggier it’ll get!

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20 – FEB. 18)
Getting shafted changed everything on the spot but it ain’t all bad. Your new karmic co-ordinates put you in prime position for payback from the Cosmic Coincidence Control Centre sometime soon. Just make sure you take damn good care of whatever comes out of it or you could end up killing your karmic credit record!

PISCES (FEB. 19 – MARCH 20)
Listen up little fishies, school is about to start and you need to pay very close attention to what you’re doing, otherwise disaster is gonna be a shoe-in. It’s time for you all to fully focus on the feats you need to complete ’cause if you don’t, you could end up on the street!

ARIES (MARCH 21 – APRIL 19)
You may love independence more than anything else but you have to accept some simple truths in life. Like the fact that sometimes, to be in, you have to be dependent on approval. Otherwise, your individuality is a threat and ’cause of your impulsiveness, they wouldn’t know which way to bet!

TAURUS (APRIL 20 – MAY 20)
Don’t waste time and money on big guns and bigger walls when no matter what you do, it’ll still end in a draw. Then how’d we beat them Commies you ask? Granted, the technique works with a few trillion bucks in your treasury but what did it say on your last paystub, bub? Sometimes it’s well worth it to just walk away!

 
You can contact The Kid at cruisinthecosmos@hotmail.com